Life would certainly be a drearier place if it were not for inventor Thomas Edison who brought us both the light bulb and the earliest incarnation of the technology behind movies and film.

Many of his quotations have to do with inspiration and perseverance and today’s sprinkle of wisdom is no different.

El genio es un uno por ciento de inspiración y un noventa y nueve por ciento de sudar.

Many of Edison’s quotations are prime fodder for the motivational market including for example:

If we attempted all the things of which we are capable, we would literally astound ourselves

And…

Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

All very rah-rah, nose to the grindstone stuff but there is another of his quotes that seems very odd today…

Direct thought is not an attribute of femininity. In this woman is now centuries behind man.

Thanks a bunch for the lightbulbs you sexist old bugger!

Whoever chose the phrases in Spanish for the sugar sachets must be a romantic soul because today’s offering is yet another observation on love by old silver-tongue himself, William Shakespeare.

Si no recuerdas la más ligera locura en que el amor te hizo caer, no has amado. Muy frecuentemente las lágrimas son la última sonrisa del amor.

Karma has a lovely way of coming back to bite your bum. Given that I basically stole my husband’s iPod Shuffle after he was given it for his birthday I should not have been surprised to receive a special gift that I was fated not to use.

And so when my lovely friend and neighbour dropped by with four tickets to the Carmen Mota production AIRAM in the Piramide de Arona, they were for a night when I just wasn’t able to go.

Dutiful daughter as I am (or sook-ma-toorie depending on your POV) I passed the tickets along to my Mum so she could go along with a posse of her cronies. This is what she had to say about the evening…

What an experience! The first half of AIRAM is a flamenco spectacular. The costumes were out of this world and quick changes like you wouldn’t believe. The dances were thrilling with the thunderous clacking of heels and dramatic flourishes keeping the audiences attention glued to the stage.

During the interval Eddie, who had initially been an unenthusiastic member of our little group, admitted that his feet were sore from all the tapping he was doing in time to the music. Sheila, his wife chimed in that her hands were sore with all the clapping. Veronica and I were equally impressed with the dazzling show and agreed that at times you could practically feel the vibration of the clacking heels in your breast bone.

The second half of AIRAM was a story told in music and dance; Carmen Mota’s interpretation of the Broadway show Victor/Victoria. There was so much emotion poured into the songs that at times I had a lump in my throat and when they rang the final curtain down I was left both thrilled and drained.

We all had a marvellous evening and I would highly recommend both AIRAM and any Carmen Mota production to anyone visiting or living in Tenerife who is looking for a spectacular night out.

Though I have not yet made it to this production I did see last year’s Essence de Amor and it was spectacular. I absolutely agree with Gaga and add my whole hearted recommendation to anyone who is wondering if they should include a Carmen Mota show in their Tenerife itinerary.

Jack and Andrea Montgomery have already produced one brilliant book for those visiting Tenerife. Quite honestly their Real Tenerife Island Drives is a must-have for anyone who decides to drop by and stay with me for a few weeks in the summer. (It’s never just popping in for the afternoon in Tenerife, is it?)

“Here”, I say, graciously, “You must have this fabulous book which gives detailed descriptions of how to get from every A to every B round the island. It’s also stuffed with funny stories and throwaway facts. Now hop in your hire car and drive off.”

I love it.

Now the pair of scribblers have come up with another great publication. Called Going Native in Tenerife it is every bit as good as the other. In fact it’s possibly even a smidgen better because … well, because I’m in it. Ha. If you place an order now you might just get the last copy from this print run.

Jack has set up a Going Native in Tenerife blog which describes the book in more detail and outlines part of the process that went in to the book’s publication. Going Native in Tenerife is already available at Amazon and Real Tenerife Island Drives is available from Jack and Andy’s Real Tenerife Island Drives website.

Go on, you know you want to.

That bunch of big softies at Central Station Bar in Playa de Las Americas are hosting a Christmas bash for Live Arico dog shelter on Saturday 20th. Starting at 6:00pm there will be festive market stalls, raffles and live entertainment from a variety of well known entertainers on the island including apparently the winner of the 2008 Tenerife’s Got Talent, Charlie Karlsen.

Central Station’s own Jeff Stewart will be the compere and word is that he will be introducing some very hot acts alongside Charlie and his golden tonsils.

So don’t forget. Sat 20th, Central Station, 6.00 pm for festive fun in support of Live Arico.

Aldo Cammarota was an Argentinian scriptwriter who was born in 1930 in Buenos Aires. He died in 2002 in Los Angeles and is attributed with the saying:

One of the most serious problems facing the world today is that many people believe that because they have studied, they do not have to think.

Today, however, the little Spanish saying on my sugar packet said:

Cuando una mujer se rinde es porque ha vendido.

It’s one thing to resign yourself to growing old gracefully if you looked like Audrey Hepburn to begin with but the only famous person I have ever been likened too is Boy George. (Thankfully that was in his Karma Chameleon years). Unfortunately now that my dumpy self and Scottish complexion are in my forties, I find myself magnetically attracted to the bottles of snake oil that stuff the pharmacy shelves. I fondle the packaging and slyly read the box ready to tell the assistant, should she ask, that I’m looking for a present for my Mum.

Stopping by the Parafarmacia Vera at the bottom of Las Galletas today to pick up some kids tutti-fruti toothpaste I couldn’t help myself drifting towards the wonder creams. From a distance a rack of silver and blue boxes caught my eye and I squinted myopically to see the legend – Snail Dribble. What?

I couldn’t resist turning the box over and instead of Spanish, I found a French translation, Bave d’Escargot (Snail Slobber) and I thanked God that no matter how crinkly I got I was never, ever going to be deperate enough to lather myself in snail slime – I mean, horrific as it sounds snail dribble isn’t accurate is it? I’m sure that silvery trail comes out of quite a different part of the snail’s anatomy…

The assistant who no doubt thought she was on to a good thing shot over to let me know what a fabulous difference this miracle ointment would make to me. Giving her a look which I hope conveyed how silly was her initial notion that my skin was in any way in need of snail dribble, I assured her that I was in fact only looking for possible Christmas presents.

For my mother!