What a breakthrough! The collected minds of government and business have come up with two prototype beer glasses, designed to resist breaking into deadly shards should they come into contact with someone’s face.
As glassing each other down the local seems to have become something of a national sport in Britain (around 87,000 injuries each year in England and Wales alone), this initiative will enable everyone to continue to get bladdered and smash each other’s face in without fear of actual prosecution.
Not that there has been much fear of prosecution in the UK lately, unless of course you are a home-owner intent on doing grievous bodily harm to the rabid gang that are in the process of murdering your family and making off with your new plasma screen t.v.
Still, that half and hour in front of the judge fairly cuts into drinking time and it gets pretty boring to keep having to come up with excuses for breaking the ASBO, so full marks to the bigwigs who dreamt this one up.
I bet it won’t be long after the introduction of these new glasses until smashing yourself in the face after downing a pint becomes a drinking game. In a race to finish your pint of Carling Black Label, winner is the first one to glass himself.
Yikes, the bars of Tenerife will be awash in blood unless they put up signs to tell that punters that glass is breakable.
I think glassing each other down the local has been a national sport in Britain for a long time. I still bear the scar in my hairline, gained in my teens, to prove it. Incidentally, it was the pattern on the side of the pint beer mug, which did not break on impact, that made the cut, so they’ll need to ban those, as well as making glasses unbreakable!