So have I been living in a bubble lately or is this an April Fool’s Day joke that is running a bit behind schedule?
Much as I would love to see Tenerife become the centre of the Google galaxy, I find the news of Google Inc decamping to Granadilla de Abona as announced in a press release by Ars-Novum in Puerto de La Cruz just a little hard to swallow (okay, a LOT hard to swallow!).
Reasons given for the major move include changes to media law by the Obama administration which will increase restrictions on the Youtube and Google video search channels and the imminent bankruptcy of the state of California.
The installation of the Network Access Point West Africa – Canary Islands is seen as one positive factor behind the move as is the possibility of harnessing green energy to run the internet giant’s service centre and the region’s low labour costs (you can say that again) and tax breaks.
While I find the story unlikely there can really only be three explanations for it, can’t there?
1. It is a badly timed April Fool’s Day joke.
2. It is a crafty PR exercise dreamt up by Ars-Novum to create some buzz about their company.
3. It is true!
Given the astronomical rise in unemployment in Tenerife since December 2009, I can’t think of better news for Tenerife than the investment in infrastructure and technology that a move like this would necessitate. It would also shift the economic reliance of the island and open it up to more sources of revenue than tourism and bananas 
Much as I would LOVE this news to be true, I am not holding my breath. Are you?
Alejandro Sanz’ Paradise Tour is said by the promoters to be the most important of his career. Certainly his Looking for Paradise release with Alicia Keys is a cracker. Here are the two of them giving it laldie (Scottish for singing their hearts out) on tour last year.
Both artists are playing in Tenerife this summer. The lovely Alicia Keys will playing Quayside in Santa Cruz in June with tickets going for €35 or €60 while Alejandro Sanz is playing Tenerife on August 28 in the Adeje Soccer Stadium. Tickets for Sanz concert are €25 for the masses while the chosen few may opt for ‘Paraiso LG’ seats for €50 which allow them to enjoy ‘toda la fuerza’ of the experience plus have their own special entrance so they can avoid rubbing shoulders with the hoi polloi.
Tickets for both events are available from generaltickets.com
Everywhere you look in Tenerife you will see banana plantations – or you won’t see them - but they are there, hidden behind that tatty looking grey net that festoons the island.
Now, for the very first time, Tenerife is hosting a banana festival complete with all sorts of wacky competitions and events – banana sculpting for example.
There will be prizes for the best banana inspired dish and plenty of banana booze as well as non-alcoholic banana drinks for the kids. It sounds like a lot of fun and I am promised more bananas than I can carry if I go along with the weans so I guess I’ll see you there. I’ll be the one checking out the banana rum…
Festival Del Platano
April 24 & 25th 2010
Troya, Playa de las Americas.
Does anyone know where the Three Greyhounds bar is? And no, smartypants, I don’t mean the one in Knutsford, Cheshire.
Apparently there is one in Tenerife somewhere and Michelle has been hunting for it high and low.
Should any kind TT reader know the place in question, please post an address and/or phone number in the comments below.
(And you might want to tell the landlord that it is cheap as chips to advertise his bar on eTenerife if he wants to drop me a line about that. )
Muchas gracias
T
he big parade in Santa Cruz which is scheduled for Tuesday 16th February is the Carnaval event, the one that all the tourists are here in Tenerife to see; the one ’second only to Rio’. But it is far from the only Carnaval event.
Every town in Tenerife has its own Carnaval with the one in Los Cristianos which runs from 5th to 14th of March and has a Viva Mexico theme this year being the last.
Even though the Arona Carnaval is not until next month, schools are out next week and so those schools which wish to do so will be having their Kids’ Parade tomorrow.
For whatever reasons my kids’ school was a bit of a wet blanket last year with none of the outings and fun stuff the kids had got to do in the previous years. There was no Carnaval Parade, no Canarian Day celebration nor big organised march through the streets to meet the Three Kings and have a picnic in the street.
All their excursions were curtailed too. No visit to the bomberos or to the airport or day spent at the Quimpi farm or environmentally-minded expedition up the side of the Red Mountain.
Although you might think the overall recession was behind the moratorium on fun outings I have a suspicion it was more to do with the teachers lobbying for better pay and jibing at the extra duties required of them in organising and sheperding these missions when they are not paid enough for their daily grind as it is.
Anyway this year somebody put the Ooooh! back in school and we are having a Carnaval Parade. Yaaay! The kids are all aquiver and very much looking forward to their special day tomorrow.
The following information should therefore be of interest to you whether you like kids and want to watch them all march past in their Carnaval disguises or whether you loathe the little monsters and want to stay the hell out of Dodge.
If you are in the Las Galletas neighbourhood tomorrow, the kids will emerge blinking into the sunlight at approximately 12.30. Some kids will be blinking more than others, especially my son who for some mysterious reason is being dressed by his teacher as a traffic light.
My daughter and her classmates will be dressed as natives of La Palma complete with white frocks (at least the girls will be in frocks) and big floppy dress hat. This year the school chose the outfits and ordered them from El Kilo. Saved a lot of messing about of course but in typical Tenerife fashion we only just got the blouse and skirt home now (2.p.m. on Thursday the day before the big event) to fix or fiddle with if it is too big or small.
As is traditional, all the parents will be there, stepping on each others toes and jostling for position to get the best shots of their babies. It is all in good fun but if you should be there and happen to get a belt in the ribs, well, I apologise in advacne but you really should know better than to get between a mum and her dookied-up darlings.
What a breakthrough! The collected minds of government and business have come up with two prototype beer glasses, designed to resist breaking into deadly shards should they come into contact with someone’s face.
As glassing each other down the local seems to have become something of a national sport in Britain (around 87,000 injuries each year in England and Wales alone), this initiative will enable everyone to continue to get bladdered and smash each other’s face in without fear of actual prosecution.
Not that there has been much fear of prosecution in the UK lately, unless of course you are a home-owner intent on doing grievous bodily harm to the rabid gang that are in the process of murdering your family and making off with your new plasma screen t.v.
Still, that half and hour in front of the judge fairly cuts into drinking time and it gets pretty boring to keep having to come up with excuses for breaking the ASBO, so full marks to the bigwigs who dreamt this one up.
I bet it won’t be long after the introduction of these new glasses until smashing yourself in the face after downing a pint becomes a drinking game. In a race to finish your pint of Carling Black Label, winner is the first one to glass himself.
Yikes, the bars of Tenerife will be awash in blood unless they put up signs to tell that punters that glass is breakable.
As promised, Tenerife Magazine are offering another fab prize for December- a five star one bedroom apartment in Pearly Grey Resort, Callao Salvaje, and entering is easy peasy. All you’ve got to do is sign up (or already be a member of the Tenerife Magazine Facebook page) and also sign as a fan of the Ingane Yami Facebook page.
Ingame Yami is a charitable project to build a special village for young AIDS orphans in Durban South Africa – definitely a worthwhile cause – which is strongly supported by Pearly Grey Resort and all its staff here in Tenerife.
I find it quite touching that the entrance requirements for this month’s Tenerife Magazine competition does not include becoming a fan on Facebook of the actual sponsor, Pearly Grey Resort or anything specific to Pearly Grey at all – all associated publicity is aimed at Ingame Yami.
Especially for that, I would urge you to become a fan of Pearly Grey as well – though as stated you do not have to do so to enter the competition.
Here are the links you need:
Tenerife Magazine December Competition
One Week, 5 star accommodation in Pearly Grey Resort
The Pearly Grey Resort is perched on the cliff top looking out across the Atlantic, with great views of La Gomera. Your 5 star one bedroom self catering apartment, has the pick of the views, and has all modern comforts for one lucky couple.
How To Enter
It’s FREE and simple to enter our competition, you just need to be a Facebook member of Tenerife Magazine. We also need you to sign up to Pearly Grey’s Ingane Yami charity page. This is a special project to build a village for AIDS orphans in Durban, South Africa.
Competition Rules
The draw will be made on 11th January 2010, and is for a one bedroom luxury self catering apartment for one week. The prize is valid for one year, subject to availability, and is not exchangeable for cash.
And finally, I am pleased to tell you that the winner of the Tenerife Magazine launch competition for a week’s holiday in luxurious Sands Beach Lanzarote, Debbie Schilling, was finally found. Whew! Thought for a minute I’d have to bite the bullet and volunteer to go myself. (Oh dream on!)
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